funereal-disease:

this is a strong contender for the funniest fucking thing I’ve ever seen

animar-seal-of-elephants:

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

sansastarkofficial:

sansastarkofficial:

Smash mouth has a song about a guy realizing the girl he’s dating is still in love with her ex girlfriend and he encourages said ex to come back and rekindle their lesbian romance

Maybe the real All Star was the bisexuals we met along the way

this is like… the exact opposite of Jolene

griffinmcelroyspisskink:

i wonder how many “hey guys are super hot no homo tho hahaha” type guys would identify as bisexual if male bisexuality was talked about more often and not like… ignored and forgotten about

mich-the-boss:

alphaofallcats:

some writer snob somewhere: Do not start sentences with But or And because doing so is grammatically incorrect.

me, writing my fic: But I don’t care. And you can’t stop me.

Sometimes…..the flow of your creative prose…..is more important….than grammatical guidelines,,,,,,

fuks:

bignosebaby:

proboscismonkey:

“In a frequently mentioned case from 1950, another lone male was seen far out in the South China Sea. He was misidentified by cruise ship passengers as a human, and a boat was lowered for assistance. The monkey climbed aboard the boat, rested for a while, but then jumped back into the sea and carried on its journey, destination unknown.” (x)

Brave, athletic, and friendly.

trixiespads:

weather-peen:

never trust a person who talk to their pets in their normal voice

NOT TRUE before my nephew leaves my home he always looks my dog straight in the eye and says “Delilah. You are a wonderful woman. Have a good day.”

enigma-boi:

kafukafuura1917:

wintgenstein:

me reading my wedding vows: i promise to always be based, and epic ftw, and to never be cringe

me